A Price To Be Paid

A Price To Be Paid

“There are only three things to know about how to get what you want. One, decide what you want. Two, decide what you are willing to give up to get it. Three, go for it.”

H.L. Hunt

I’ve been thinking . . . about all the people who desire better results in their life.

Have you ever noticed how much you can learn by watching people? I’ve been privileged to travel around the country speaking to associations and organizations as well as attending conventions and conferences to learn about leadership, team building, change, stress, and personal success. It seems that more often than not, I encounter people and situations that provide marvelous illustrations to support the life principles I’m learning or teaching. A flight home from New Jersey was no different.

Two men made their way down the aisle of the 737 displaying behaviors common to people not accustomed to flying. They struggled to find their correct seats and nervously asked a flight attendant for assistance as they neared my row.

One man was dressed in a tee shirt with a picture of a fish spreading from his plump stomach over his right shoulder to the middle of his back. The shirt was about three inches too short (you get the picture). His face hadn’t been shaved for several days and neither had he taken the time to wash and comb his hair or wash his jeans.

His buddy was dressed in a black and red wool coat, complimented by a green and brown camouflage cap. His blackened teeth, greasy hair and significant body odor led me to think he was not well versed in appropriate personal hygiene.

The men seated themselves across the aisle and a few rows ahead of me. I found myself watching them and their insistence on leaning over each other and the woman in the window seat so they could see out the window. Suddenly, both men jumped up and moved to the row behind them -- one in the window seat, the other on the aisle. Thirty seconds later, the man in the plaid coat quickly made a dash to the window seat in the row behind him, now directly across from me.

The flight attendants began their pre-flight safety instructions. One of them asked the man who had just moved to the window seat if he was aware that he was seated in an exit row. “Are you capable of performing the duties required of you in the improbable event of a crash?” the flight attendant asked.

“What responsibilities?” he responded with surprise in his voice.

“You must be able to remove the exit door so passengers can escape,” she replied matter-of-factly.

A startled look came across the man’s face as he quickly replied, “No way, I don’t want that kind of responsibility!” He jumped out of the exit row and situated himself in an aisle seat.

I thought to myself, as I watched him settle in for the nearly 3-hour flight: “This is so indicative of people naive about what it takes to get what they want. Rarely are they willing to assume the responsibility that goes with the privilege. Success in any endeavor demands more than a casual investment.

H.L. Hunt made it quite clear that, to get what you want, you must decide what you are willing to give up and then go for it. Successful people “give up” the convenience of doing only what they want to do when they want to do it. Be prepared every day to do something you don’t want to do but know you should do to achieve what you want. It’s a price every winner knows they have to pay. Zig Ziglar confirmed this prerequisite for success when he said: “When you do the things you ought to do when you ought to do them, the day will come when you will do the things you want to do when you want to do them.”

The next time you are tempted to move into the exit row aisle seat (or any other desired position in life), decide first if you are willing to accept the responsibility it requires. There is a price to be paid.

“To succeed. . . you need to find something to hold on to, something to motivate you, something to inspire you.”

Tony Dorsett

Enjoy Living

Enjoying the “Process” of Living

“Life is too precious to waste. Do not take even a moment for granted, for things are built upon the accumulation of moments.”

Kim Woo-Choong
Every Street Is Paved With Gold

I’ve Been Thinking . . . about and watching the Winter Olympics. I love the Olympics and must admit I can vegetate several hours in front of the television cheering on our athletes. Every Olympics produces feel good stories and examples of people who overcame incredible odds to perform at the Olympic level.

Speed skater Apolo Anthon Ohno is capturing the hearts and attention of Olympic enthusiasts with his record setting performance. Before Apolo, there was another great Olympic speed skating story.

When Olympic gold medal speed skater Dan Jansen was nine years old, he was competing at the youth national speed skating championships in Minnesota. His first national title was clearly in sight as he came around a turn and tripped on a rubber hose officials had set up as a lane marker. That single slip cost Jansen the title by one point.

He cried. He cried as his mother removed his skates. He cried during the award ceremonies. He was still crying when he got into the car to return home and continued crying until the family pulled into their driveway six hours later.

Dan’s father had remained quiet the entire trip. As they got out of the car he looked at Dan and said quietly, “You know, Dan, there’s more to life than skating around in a circle.”

“There’s more to life than skating around in a circle.” Not bad advice, even for the non-skater. In the quest for perfecting our lives or just steering clear of personal entropy, sustained satisfaction and fulfillment can be experienced.

Contrary to popular opinion, it is not necessary to be a superstar to enjoy quality of life. Achieving lofty goals and striving to make our inspiring dreams come true is important. But the real juice, life’s defibrillator in the good times and bad, is experienced much less in the result of our efforts than in the process of living itself.

I know we are taught in countless ways to value the completed product, the trophy, the finish line, achieving first place. Just how many of those mountain top experiences have you had in the last thirty days? Most of us are never going to win a gold medal. Our accomplishments are rarely applauded by huge crowds on a daily basis. Being on the cover of a major magazine is probably beyond our reach.

Measuring life ONLY by our achievements can leave one’s heart with an erratic, unfulfilled beat. I know this is blatantly obvious yet subtly mysterious. How it feels to be alive is the ultimate measuring stick.

Psychologist William Moulton Marston once wrote in The Rotarian, that in two years he'd managed to ask approximately 3,000 people. "What do you live for?" About 2,800 of them--more than nine out of ten of them--confessed in various degrees, that they were merely enduring their present lives, hoping for some perfect future not clearly determined and less astutely planned. If you're still waiting for that perfect Utopia life, not enjoying your present life, then you will probably not enjoy life any more if your life were to improve.

This is important! If you think you need a missing piece in order to feel fulfilled, satisfied and capable of living over the edge, you will still feel incomplete no matter what you acquire or achieve. People who live their lives to the fullest simply get up in the morning and can't wait to start all over again.

"Excuse me," said one bird to another. "You are older, more mature and experienced than I and can no doubt help me. Tell me, where can I find this thing they call the sky? I've been flying around searching for it everywhere."

"The sky?" answered the seasoned bird. "You are flying in it right now."

You are immersed in life. Everything you need is at your disposal and the choices you make today will determine the future you experience. Just like the bird, you are surrounded by the necessary factors for enjoying the process of living.

The irony of this, is that people who cherish the “process” of living often experience victories. Dan Jansen for instance. Disappointed at the 1984 Olympics, again in 1988 after learning about the death of his sister, who had been fighting leukemia for more than a year, and then struggling with a final turn in 1992 and finishing out of the medals in fourth place.

At his fourth Olympic experience in 1994, Dan was expected to win the coveted gold in the 500 meters. He had already been a record setter in the past and this was his specialty race. Again, tragedy struck. He didn’t fall, but in the beginning of the final turn he lost control of his left skate momentarily, slowing him down just enough to finish in eighth place. It must have been pretty difficult to put his father’s advice into perspective. “You know, Dan, there’s more to life than skating around in a circle.”

One race remained. The 1,000 meter. No matter what, Dan Jansen planned to retire. At the midway point of the race, the clock showed he was skating at a world-record pace, and the crowd sensed the significance and tension in this final race. They cheered and shared the experience with him. When Dan Jansen crossed the finish line, a WR appeared beside his name on the scoreboard--world record. Dan Jansen had finally won that elusive gold medal. His Olympic futility ultimately ended in triumph.

This message is for everyone. It is written as a gentle reminder that quality of life, sensitivity to the splendors of everyday living, and the excitement of feeling fully alive are available to all. You will not be immune from disappointments, periodic failures, or even slipping on the final turn of a successful venture. People special to you will die, your dreams will be thwarted, and your goal may at times appear unattainable.

But, you persevere. Why?

Here’s the reality check. Life is not a spectator sport. Approaching life by sitting in the stands and watching the action from a distance is not a viable option. Exerting every ounce of energy toward maximizing the quality of your life is the suggested minimal standard. Otherwise, life may become nothing more than skating in a circle.
Life is a lot like Play-Dough. Within each of us is the power to mold it. We can mold ourselves and our environment. It is up to each of us to begin the molding process with a final product in mind. It is within each of us, the power to mold a desirable lifestyle.

“I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.”

Source Unknown